RELATIONSHIP AND ​​​​INTIMACY COACHING


love, sex and desire


Here are only some of the more common ways Relationship, Sex

and Intimacy Coaching can illuminate and enhance your sexual life.

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Are problems in your relationship getting in the way of intimacy that can lead to arousal and passion? For women in particular, emotional closeness is a major ingredient in sexual desire. Arguments, resentment, poor communication, betrayal of trust and other barriers to intimacy can steer your sex drive off the road. Using tools to establish trust and a feeling of secure attachment again is the first step in inviting desire and sex back into your relationship.  


Premature Ejaculation, Erectile Challenges are common concerns for men and can be easily solved. With practice, you can control your rate of arousal, making it possible to enjoy prolonged intercourse with your partner. Whether due to surgery, aging or stress, sharing your feelings, exploring beliefs, rebuilding your confidence is an important part of moving forward in rewiring your arousal and appreciating your body. There is much to be said about these challenges but I can assure you that you can learn how to become the master of your erections and your arousal. Ask me about my programs for Erectile Challenges and Lasting Longer.

Loss of desire for sex can sometimes mean we’re just not getting the kind of sex we want, plain and simple! Learning what you want and how to ask for it takes exploration and confidence. Initiating a conversation about trying new things can be scary, but it can also be an amazing aphrodisiac to your sex life. I’ll help you along the path of learning new ways to share who you are and what you want from your partner.


.Sexual boredom happens in the best of relationships. Familiarity and predictability create a sense of security but they can also work against passion and desire. Feeling sexually uninspired doesn’t mean you’re broken. It just means that it’s time to explore together and find ways of seeing each other with fresh eyes. Again, if it starts in your mind, your body will follow. I can help you with both. It may begin an adventure you wish you’d embarked on years ago. It’s never too late. Let me say that again. It’s NEVER too late.


Do you have sexual issues that stem from negative beliefs that were formed from difficult or shameful experiences?  It never works to try to manage or suppress traumatic experiences. Your subconscious mind seeks resolution. I use hypnosis as a safe and controllable method to sensitively disempower the negative memories that fuel your inner critic and undermine your happiness and sexual confidence. 


Along these same lines, a lack of self-acceptance around our sexual identity or sexual preferences can create shame and emotional complication in how we view ourselves as sexual beings. Family, friends, and society can instill harmful beliefs that leave us feeling undeserving of a happy and healthy sexual life. Maybe it's time to say no to other people's stories and start to rewrite your own.

I work with client of all sexual orientation. 


As a Kink Aware Professional (K.A.P.) I am listed in the NCSF (National Coalition for Sexual Freedom) directory as a sex educator for couples who want to use kink to expand their experience of eroticism.. Tantra as well, can open doors to deeper intimacy and connection. Both kink and tantra are rich and complex ways of sexually engaging with a partner. 

I encourage a couple's confidence to step out of what's familiar and find the spirit of adventure that puts the 'fun' back into sex and expands their erotic menu.


If your brain is producing stress hormones and your mind is distracted with life and work, sexual desire and arousal will not come easily. Job stress, money troubles, caring for a sick family member, parenting, past trauma, and other stressors can decrease libido. It’s normal! Ironically, sex itself can become your favorite healthy destresser. Let’s find ways of making that the case.


If menopausal symptoms are changing your hormonal balance, patterns of arousal can change, leading to frustration and loss of interest. But the hormonal changes of menopause are only part of the picture. An aging woman can become concerned about her sex drive and how that affects the quality of her relationship, her body image and self-esteem. I support women (and their partners) in learning new ways of experiencing sexual pleasure that incorporates our changing bodies and libidos. 


Pornography is a complicated subject these days. I support a multitude of sexual tools to keep your life juicy and turned-on but let me say this: Studies are now showing exactly how porn impacts your brain and your arousal patterns. Since the advent of online porn erectile disfunction in men under 40 (worldwide) has spiked by 1000 percent! This is not based on shame or judgement, like young boys being told they'd go blind if they masturbated. This is based on up to date brain research that was prompted by the many accounts from young men all over the world who suffer from a loss of libido and suffer erectile challenges. If you're experiencing desire and performance issues and you have a constant diet of online sexual stimulation, there is more to know about how your brain and arousal pattern is being impacted. If you think porn is robbing you of response and turn-on to sex with a real person, be open to experimenting with fasting or greatly reducing online porn for 1 month or two. You might be surprised. 


Sometimes our lack of sexual interest can be about our self-image and fear of being judged. Women (and men) are constantly assaulted with pressures to look a certain way. Our bodies change with time. Self-consciousness can shut down sexual confidence like nothing else. What negative beliefs are keeping you from feeling sexually alive? Let's change them!


Illness and aging can alter our relationship to sex. That’s normal. Learning about and accepting our changing bodies is a big part of ensuring that sex remains a vital part of our lives.  Sex can often be an expanded menu of sensual pleasure and take us into whole new chapters of discovering our sexual selves as life evolves. If cancer has altered your sexual experience, go to Intimacy and Cancer on this site. 

 If you’re afraid of intimacy, sex will lose its appeal. Learning how to welcome intimacy and nurture connection with a partner is key in any relationship. Let’s explore what might be scary to you about intimacy, so you can enjoy and connect to all the people in your life. 


The seemingly simple act of talking about sex can sometimes leave you feeling shy and frozen. Getting your sexual needs met begins with using your voice with words that are clear and loving. Let's look at the pitfalls that can prevent sharing your desires and fantasies. Stepping out from behind your veil of self-consciousness in the bedroom will empower you to ask for what you want in every part of your life.




           lovesexanddesire@gmail.com         www.lovesexanddesire.com      415-634-7330